DOES HAVING MANY LOVERS MAKE YOU A GOOD LOVER?

This a common belief, but what kind of beneficial experience can one gain from that?

Every new lover usually provides the same sequence of experiences: falling in love, having a lot of passionate sex culminating in orgasm, getting bored, tired and disappointed and then looking for the next lover. Having a lot of lovers can be a waste of time and energy. It is hardly likely to give you an experience of love. Love develops with time and when two partners work together on their relationship.

Men and women who are counting lovers can often be very selfcentered individuals and also more likely to develop a consumerist attitude towards other people’s bodies and energies. They are less able to love and connect, which takes time, and so are unable to sustain a relationship. Many in this group of people see sex as a physical performance for their ego. The important thing is not how many lovers you have had but what experience you gained from these relationships. What you have understood and learned from these lovers, how you have changed and developed as a lover.

To become a good lover, go on a life-longjourney of discovery of your own and your partner’s sexuality. Your sexuality is an energy you can cultivate, accumulate and radiate to someone else as a gift.

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